This time of year--which parents seem to dread and look forward to in equal measure--parents of school-age kids can use all the help and advice they can get to make the transition a bit easier on everyone. FamilyFun senior producer Sally Jones sat down with parenting experts Shelley Butler and Deb Kratz to find out what we can do.FamilyFun: Going from a laid-back summer to a hectic back-to-school schedule is challenging for most households. What can parents do to make the transition a smooth one?
Shelley and Deb: First, just know that no matter how well-prepared you and your child are, the first weeks of school will most likely put you all in a tailspin. New experiences, people, and classes are exciting and yet, cause stress, too. Being well prepared for the transition can certainly cut down on some of the stress.
The basic things to prepare for all kids include gradually bringing bedtime in line with what it needs to be on school nights, always making sure kids get enough sleep (at least 9 hours for elementary school kids, according to one of the National Institutes of Health, and 8 for high school kids, according to sleep experts), getting back to regular mealtimes if they've changed over the summer, making sure your child has good food, encouraging kids to get back in the habit of reading every day if they have slacked off in the summer, and reading to young kids about starting or returning to school. If your child is in child care, involved in after-school activities, or is mature enough to stay home alone after school, make sure everyone involved knows where to go, when, what the rules are, and what the back-up plan is. Also, it can help a lot to keep the week just before school starts and the few weeks after less hectic and free of vacations, camps, extra activities, or lots of guests.
Another way to smooth the transition is by understanding something about what your child expects to be dealing with so you can deal with it. Kids put a lot of energy into starting a new year, trying to understand new routines, meeting new expectations, and wondering about new and old friendships. Some kids may be more tired, some more hungry, and some more wired than usual after school. Whatever your child usually is, expect more of it during the beginning of school. Realistically, though, each time kids have a break from school whether it is a weekend, a vacation or a break on the alternative school calendar, they experience a transition that can be hard for many kids. Your understanding of this and help in getting through it will mean a lot to your child.
As with most big recurring occasions in life, a special something you routinely do around the occasion will be something kids will remember and carry with them throughout their lives. Even something simple like ice cream sundaes as part of an annual Back-to-School dinner will make a lasting impression. Another way to make it positive is to compare pictures of previous years to recent pictures, and talk about how much your child has grown and changed, and how much more she knows and can do now than in the previous year. Talk about how every year of school offers the opportunity to try new things, make new friends, and explore new ideas.
For yourself, take some time alone to sit back, take pause, and reflect on all you have done to bring this child to this place in time--every meal prepared and shared, every celebration, every diaper change, every bit of encouragement, every load of laundry, every moment of redirection, every bedtime story read, every fear comforted--the list goes on and on--has brought your child further along the path of becoming all that he or she can be. Congratulate yourself for all you have done.
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