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Starting a Parents' Support Group at Work

by Sue Price Crites and
Tom Crites

Question As a new mother, I've enjoyed the support I've been getting from coworkers who are also relatively new at parenting. Occasionally, two or three of us get together on our lunch hour to talk about child-rearing issues and the work-and-family juggling act. I think we should start a parent support group so we can broaden our base, but my colleagues are nervous about how management will react. They're afraid our bosses will think we're forming a group to raise complaints or make demands of the company. How can we win the company's blessing?


Answer You win it by pointing out the group's benefits to the company. Having a forum for sharing experiences and offering solutions to each other's problems can make employees feel better about their workplace. Higher morale fosters productivity and loyalty. A parent support group could be used as a recruiting tool. And it could enhance the company's image.

Your bosses know that, even without company recognition, a group could gather informally at lunch--and grumble about the lack of employer support. So they might as well give their blessing and let you use a conference room for your meetings.

APPROACHING MANAGEMENT
Figure out who you should ask for management support. The personnel department is a likely place to start. Describe what you're planning, such as monthly meetings during the lunch hour so attendance won't interfere with work.

The group's organizers should speak to their immediate supervisors, also, because what you do will reflect on them. Ask if your boss is willing to let you spend a little work time on administrative tasks for the group, such as fielding phone calls and arranging for speakers. If one of you has a boss who is likely to be negative to the idea, that person probably should work in the background and let others with supportive supervisors take the visible positions.

WHAT TO ASK FOR
Besides a meeting place, you need a means of communication. Ask about using the company's interoffice mail system, e-mail, bulletin boards, employee newsletter and photocopier.

There are many other ways your employer could support you. If it's a big organization, you might find department heads willing to take turns providing soft drinks or cookies for the meetings. Maybe the company will pay small stipends for speakers. If you can't get stipends, how about token gifts--a coffee mug or tote bag, for instance--for speakers willing to attend for free?

You might ask for a bulletin board reserved for information for working parents. Or how about a shelf where your group could keep books and other resources for parents to borrow?

MEETING CONTENT AND STRUCTURE
You can make the meetings as formal or informal as the members want. Some groups just get together and talk. Some choose a topic or two for each meeting and have one parent lead the discussion.

You also could invite speakers occasionally. A local librarian could talk about good books for kids; a medical person could teach you first aid for babies. The topics are limitless.

Encourage members to bring pictures of their kids. Ask them to clip out newspaper and magazine articles to share with the group.

Inevitably, discussions get around to workplace issues. Decide as a group how much confidentiality you'd like to maintain. If someone asks for advice on how to deal with a boss who's demanding too much overtime, will the boss hear about it through the grapevine?

CHANGING COMPANY POLICY
While you don't want to give the impression that you're inciting rebellion, your group may identify work and family issues it would like to bring to management's attention. For that reason, you may want to invite a personnel officer or key executive from time to time, to hear your group's thoughts and to answer questions. You also could offer to conduct a survey of working parents to find out how the company could improve the work environment.

Depending on how open your company is to employee concerns, your group could become an important catalyst for policy change.

Susan Crites Price and Tom Price are the authors of WORKING PARENTS HELP BOOK: PRACTICAL ADVICE FOR DEALING WITH THE DAY-TO-DAY CHALLENGES OF KIDS AND CAREERS and the syndicated column "Working Parents Lifeline." They live in Washington, D.C., with their daughter.

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