I'm currently trying to get my three-year-old daughter to sleep in her own bed. I've resorted to letting her "cry it out." However, she cries so hard, she makes herself throw up. And if she does fall asleep, she wakes up at 2:30 A.M. and gets in bed with me. What should I do?

Your goal here is to teach your daughter 1) to put herself to sleep and 2) to settle herself back to sleep without your comforting presence when she wakes during the night.

A GRADUAL APPROACH
The crying-it-out method may be just too drastic for your child. Instead, try a gradual withdrawal of your nighttime sleeping support.

Put her to bed at night, then sit in a chair by her side, touching her gently until she falls asleep. After three or four days, continue sitting by her until she falls asleep but don't touch her. Do this step for a few days. Then move outside her bedroom door. Every five minutes say, "Mommy's here; you need to go to sleep." Repeat this refrain in monotone until she falls asleep. Leave the door open. If she gets down from her bed shut the door.

THE SLEEPING BAG TECHNIQUE
For the middle of the night treks into your bedroom, place a sleeping bag on the floor. When she tiptoes into your room, tell her she has a choice: Either you'll escort her back to her bed or she can sleep in the sleeping bag on the floor.

It's fair to inform your child of your plan. If you proceed deliberately and consistently, she'll most likely be sleeping independently in three weeks. Prepare yourself for some tears, but the vomiting should stop.