Since the children will be home from school for the holidays, rather than trying to find a way to keep them occupied so you can cook, make them your assistants and let each child contribute his own special dish. Here's how:

•Start out at least a week before by going through family recipes and cookbooks and determining which part of the meal will be prepared by each family member (include Dad, too!).

•Have each child choose one dish to make with you for the holiday meal. The both of you will spend quality time together, and they get to feel proud of the contribution. You'll be getting help and they'll be getting attention.

•Plan a shopping excursion with these dishes in mind so the kids are involved from the start; then you won't have to stop mid-recipe because you're missing a crucial ingredient.

•To make things less hectic and to give each child special one-on-one attention, try to get some of the recipe's advance preparation done a few days ahead, whenever possible.

•Schedule the actual cooking time with each child--and keep the appointment!

Parents will be surprised how much "pressure" is lifted as you invite your budding chefs to help with turkey stuffing, cranberry dishes, potato recipes and more. It's a lot more fun to cook with company than to be enslaved by a huge meal all alone.

You can ask each child to name their recipe after themselves. Encourage them to make a few changes to the standard recipe to personalize it as "theirs."

My own boys have personalized our turkey stuffing and a fabulous cranberry side dish. The pride they exude when mealtime arrives and their special dish is served is so all-consuming for them, I am quite certain that they'll remember the collaborative aspect of our holiday experience for decades to come.