When planning a vacation with young children, parents typically put the needs of the kids first. But it doesn't have to be that way.

In an attempt to draw more family travelers, many hotels and resorts across the U.S. and Canada now offer activities for every member of the family: while the kids are playing, Dad can golf while Mom enjoys a facial. Later, parents can enjoy a relaxing, romantic dinner without interruption. Don't worry, your kids will be so busy listening to stories, playing parachute games and meeting new friends, they'll hardly miss you.

Before booking your stay, be sure to refer to our list of questions-- there's nothing like getting to a hotel or resort and finding out that it's not at all like the brochures.

1. Do children stay free of charge?

2. Do you offer discounts on adjoining rooms? If so, how much?

3. Do any rooms offer kitchenettes or mini refrigerators? Think about your needs. You may want an all-suite hotel over a double room.

4. Do you offer baby-sitting services or do you have a relationship with an off-site baby-sitting service? What are the qualifications of the staff? How long have they been in business? Can you provide references? Are they qualified in CPR? Baby-sitting services should be licensed, bonded and insured.

5. Do you have an on-site doctor or registered nurse?

6. Do you have a pool? A wading pool? Are there lifeguards on duty? Is the pool enclosed by a fence?

7. What kind of supervised activities do you offer for my children's age group? What do they include? What are the qualifications of the staff? You'll want the staff members to be a minimum age of l8 and have at least two years of experience working with children.

8. Does the hotel offer children's meals? What are they?

9. Do you offer cribs, strollers or other children's supplies at no charge? Make sure to ask about bedsheets for the crib and diaper services.

10. Do you offer child-proofing kits?

11. What kind of doorknobs does the bathroom have? Bathrooms are one of the most hazardous places for children. You'll be able to child-proof a regular doorknob, but not a lever-type doorknob.

12. Does the hotel have a smoke alarm and a sprinkler system? Are there clearly marked exits on every floor?

13. Do you offer in-house laundry service? Only a parent knows the perils of traveling with a limited amount of clothes and a messy toddler.

Jeanne Muchnick lives in Larchmont, New York, with her two daughters.

Please keep in mind that phone numbers, addresses, and prices are subject to change. Updated August 2005.